Meh.

Your Sex Icon by xo wildxfire ox
Username
Girl/Boy
Your Sex Icon
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Eh.

Well then. Tomorrow's valentine's day. How depressing for me.

Lately, I haven't been myself, really. I've felt sort of... despondent. Desolate, you know? I don't know what it's from. Probably unrequited love, but I think that's just part of it. I have no idea what's going to happen to me, you know, and if I'll regret anything. I know, one of my things is living without regret, but I'm uncertain.

I suppose I'm just lonely. I mean, I know I have friends like Marina and Dylan, but I have nobody who will genuinely wrap their arms around me and 'cover me', as RENT would say. Nobody whom I can give my heart to. Is this just normal pre-valentines blues? I mean, I feel like I'm missing something, somebody, and I feel like crying because of it. I feel incomplete.

Yeah, I know, it sounds corny. But it's true. I just feel like slamming my head against the wall because it's stupid that I feel this strongly about one damn person. I want to, you know, not feel like this, but I can't help it and it's driving me nuts. Why do I have to care, damnit? It's like there's a duel of the fates going on between my heart and my brain and I don't know whose side I'm on. They both know I'll get hurt anyway, but one says I should go for it and the other says forget it.

God, it's annoying and tiring. I mean, how do people get from here to there? How did I let myself fall, eh? I should know better by now, that he still loves his ex and I'm just left alone in the corner. I should have realized the warning signs of falling, and I should have stopped them. But I was foolish. I didn't.

And now I'm so tired. Tired of thinking of him, tired of crying at night. Exhausted emotionally and physically. It's like I'm caught in a war between two people, and my heart has to be a casualty.

What to do?