B DAY B LUNCH!
XD On a lighter note, here are some quotes that I just need to right down somewhere from my many adventures at B Day B Lunch.
E= Ellen (moi!)
D= David (My sarcastic cellist friend)
J= Jackie (Jackie the ripper!)
T= Tom (AKA God)
P= Paige (the dense)
AND WE COMMENCE!
D: I hate that 'John' kid.
E: Aw, we all know 'John' is just fighting his raging sexuality.
D: His raging sexuality, Ellen?
E: Shit. I forgot the homo.
D: I got an 'I'll accept that' out of Mr. Gallo this morning.
E: Really?
D: Yeah, he messed up on a problem and I corrected him.
E: I say hello to him in the halls sometimes. I think he's forgotten me sincewhence-
D: What the fuck. Did you just say sincewhence?
E: I think I did.
D: That was the last thing I expected to hear today, right up there with 'I forgot the homo'.
T: Ah! Oh god! I got pigeon! In my eye!
T: Ew, I think I stepped on a grape.
J: Did you just say you screwed up a rape?
D: No!
E: He said he 'stepped on a grape'.
J: Sorry! Grape and rape sound exactly alike, just take off the 'G'!
D: Right, because you go up to your neighbor's house and ask to borrow a bowl of rapes. (This spawned 'Want some rapes?' ' I want some rape soda.' 'I need a cluster of rapes.' 'Care for a glass of rape juice?' 'I want a rape popsicle' and 'rape flavored candy'.)
P: And she's going in for the final potato, yes sir, and it's gonna be close-
E: Dude, why the fuck are you running commentary on my soup?
E: We were talking about the Phoenecians today in history, and I was like, how the hell do you have a language without vowels?
D: The vowels were spoken. Just not written.
E: Nah. It's possible to speak a language without vowels!
D: Dude, I could speak that language with just a brick and a mallet.
E: How would you make the 's' sound?
D: I'd scrape it against a wall.
E: Who said there were walls?
(This led to the logic of 'If there are no vowels, there are no walls'.)
J: We were going to be mugged! By the guy at the bus!
T: Jackie, he was in a -wheelchair-.
J: He could have been faking!
T: Jackie, did you even look at him? The guy had no LEGS.
J: HE WAS STILL GOING TO MUG US.
P: So is the guy in the wheelchair gonna come and kaboom you? (On the word kaboom, make gun motions)
D: Kaboom is not a verb!
E: It's onomonopeia. (I can't spell it.)
P: SH! That's not the point. The point is, you never know who's toting around, you know, a shottie? How do you know he's not going to whip out two shotguns, because you know, if you have no legs, you gotta have two guns...
(More twisted logic. So the thesis stands: No vowels= No walls. No legs= Two guns.)
J: Okay, so say this soda can *grabs Ellen's soda can* is us. And these people swarm in, I mean swarm-
E: *as Jackie is talking, picks up soda can and drinks*
J: Hey! Put us down and stop drinking us!
AND For good measure...
Dr. S: One, two, three, FERMATA!
E= Ellen (moi!)
D= David (My sarcastic cellist friend)
J= Jackie (Jackie the ripper!)
T= Tom (AKA God)
P= Paige (the dense)
AND WE COMMENCE!
D: I hate that 'John' kid.
E: Aw, we all know 'John' is just fighting his raging sexuality.
D: His raging sexuality, Ellen?
E: Shit. I forgot the homo.
D: I got an 'I'll accept that' out of Mr. Gallo this morning.
E: Really?
D: Yeah, he messed up on a problem and I corrected him.
E: I say hello to him in the halls sometimes. I think he's forgotten me sincewhence-
D: What the fuck. Did you just say sincewhence?
E: I think I did.
D: That was the last thing I expected to hear today, right up there with 'I forgot the homo'.
T: Ah! Oh god! I got pigeon! In my eye!
T: Ew, I think I stepped on a grape.
J: Did you just say you screwed up a rape?
D: No!
E: He said he 'stepped on a grape'.
J: Sorry! Grape and rape sound exactly alike, just take off the 'G'!
D: Right, because you go up to your neighbor's house and ask to borrow a bowl of rapes. (This spawned 'Want some rapes?' ' I want some rape soda.' 'I need a cluster of rapes.' 'Care for a glass of rape juice?' 'I want a rape popsicle' and 'rape flavored candy'.)
P: And she's going in for the final potato, yes sir, and it's gonna be close-
E: Dude, why the fuck are you running commentary on my soup?
E: We were talking about the Phoenecians today in history, and I was like, how the hell do you have a language without vowels?
D: The vowels were spoken. Just not written.
E: Nah. It's possible to speak a language without vowels!
D: Dude, I could speak that language with just a brick and a mallet.
E: How would you make the 's' sound?
D: I'd scrape it against a wall.
E: Who said there were walls?
(This led to the logic of 'If there are no vowels, there are no walls'.)
J: We were going to be mugged! By the guy at the bus!
T: Jackie, he was in a -wheelchair-.
J: He could have been faking!
T: Jackie, did you even look at him? The guy had no LEGS.
J: HE WAS STILL GOING TO MUG US.
P: So is the guy in the wheelchair gonna come and kaboom you? (On the word kaboom, make gun motions)
D: Kaboom is not a verb!
E: It's onomonopeia. (I can't spell it.)
P: SH! That's not the point. The point is, you never know who's toting around, you know, a shottie? How do you know he's not going to whip out two shotguns, because you know, if you have no legs, you gotta have two guns...
(More twisted logic. So the thesis stands: No vowels= No walls. No legs= Two guns.)
J: Okay, so say this soda can *grabs Ellen's soda can* is us. And these people swarm in, I mean swarm-
E: *as Jackie is talking, picks up soda can and drinks*
J: Hey! Put us down and stop drinking us!
AND For good measure...
Dr. S: One, two, three, FERMATA!
